Be You

RED LION, Pa. (WHTM) -

“His name is Issak” read the stickers worn by supporters during Thursday night’s school board meeting in Red Lion.

Those who turned out said they did so in hopes of putting a face to the name; a name that the school does not plan to announce at graduation.

Born Sierra Stambaugh, 18-year-old Issak Wolfe made the transition from female to male the summer before his junior year at Red Lion Area High School.

“I know a name means a lot, so I went with what would honor my parents the most,” he said.

Wolfe, along with his supporters and a 2,000 person petition, pled for the school to announce his male name at the June 7 graduation ceremony.

“Reading my female name would only hurt me more,” he said to the board.

Issak’s mom, April, had reached out to the school prior to the meeting.

“It would mean a lot to his family if (they) would read his name at graduation,” she said.

The district has said it will allow Wolfe to wear a black cap and gown for boys, as opposed to the yellow cap and gown mandated for girls, but it has told Wolfe that only legal names will be read at graduation.

You have a legal name,” school board member Ben Pratt said. “You have a legal name that is on your diploma.”

Wolfe said he is getting his name legally changed, but the process cannot be completed in time for graduation. It’s a lengthy process that Mechanicsburg senior Caden, born Catelyn, knows all too well.

“In Pennsylvania, it’s really hard and costs a lot of money,” he said.

The ACLU, which is representing Wolfe, said that it’s not about the diploma, but for Wolfe to be recognized for who he is: someone who wants to make a difference.

“I stood up for myself. I stood up for other students in the future, and that’s what counts,” he said.

The board commended the efforts of Wolfe and his supporters and say they will continue to deliberate privately over the possibility of reading his male name.

Visit The Link For the Video: http://www.abc27.com/story/22277768/transgendered-teen-confronts-school-board-over-graduation-name

MANILA, Philippines (UPDATE) — Actor Martin del Rosario will portray a transgender pageantwinner in an upcoming episode of the long-running drama anthology “Maalaala Mo Kaya (MMK).”

Scheduled to air on Saturday, May 18, the episode will see the 20-year-old actor wearing highheels and long gowns as Kevin Balot, the Filipino transgender who won the 2012 Miss International Queen pageant held in Thailand.

The 21-year-old Balot bested 21 other transgender beauties from 15 countries to take home the Philippines’ first crown from the international pageant.

“I dared to do the role. I did it. Hope u watch mmk sa sabado,” del Rosario said on Twitter.

“Reading all ur tweets. Sobrang salamat! Thanks for all the support… Overwhelmed ako sa positive tweets nyo sa mmk. Thank you!!” he added.

“Bakit lahat nagagandahan sa akin? di ba pwedeng guapo naman? HAHAH!”

As Balot in “MMK,” del Rosario portrays the only boy of three siblings, who struggles with his real identity to fulfill his father’s dream for him to become an engineer.

His relationship with his parents change when he finally decides to admit his sexual preference, and openly join beauty contests.

Directed by Mae Czarina Cruz, this Saturday’s episode of “MMK” will also feature Al Tantay, Shamaine Centenera, Kokoy De Santo, Kristel Fulgar, Toby Alejar, Emmanuelle Vera, Cheska Billones, Louise Bernardo, Princess Freking and Dax Bayani.

Source: http://www.abs-cbnnews.com/entertainment/05/16/13/martin-del-rosario-plays-transgender-beauty-queen

When he first learned about gender transition in 2006 from a character named Max on “The L Word,” Kendon Fisher was a lesbian-identified teenager who had never met or spoken to a trans person. Seven years later, he has a large circle of trans friends and an extended family of brothers on YouTube.

“When I first discovered YouTube I was scared. I would try to convince myself that I wasn’t transgender – even the word transgender freaked me out,” Fisher, now 21, says. “I know it’s ironic because I live in Portland, but at the time I honestly felt like the only trans person on this planet. It’s crazy how only a couple clicks around on YouTube and instantly I knew I wasn’t alone.”

Fisher lurked on the recently launched video site for three years before posting a video of his own. He would spend hours each day watching the lives of strangers change on his laptop. With the volume down low and no interest in leaving comments, Fisher wasn’t ready to be seen.

But eventually, he began posting personal video logs about his struggles with identity, family, and the world around him, as well as connecting with other users via comments and private messages.

Many of the videos from Fisher and others like him feel like one-half of a video chat between close friends. In between updates about transition-related milestones are everyday life updates — getting a puppy, having a frustrating day at work, meeting someone cute, catching a cold. Nothing is too mundane, too profane, or too intimate.

Wesley Chernin, a 26-year-old trans man, says that level of vulnerability can be scary. But it’s gotten easier as he’s grown more comfortable with himself.

Like Fisher, Chernin’s engagement with YouTube’s trans community evolved along a familiar arc — support seeking, story sharing, documentation of physical changes, discussion of social and theoretical concepts — as his own transition unfolded.

The two first met at a downtown Portland Starbucks not long after Fisher posted a video about his experience at the 2011 Portland Pride Festival. At this point, he still hadn’t met any other trans folks, and was disappointed with what he saw as a lack of trans visibility at Pride. Chernin reached out and the two shared a nearly instant bond.

“We hit it off right away and kind of became attached at the hips for a few months. Come to think of it, Kendon was the first friend I made as a guy,” Chernin says. “It was kind of like meeting my best friend at 3 years old — we were stepping foot into this huge, unknown world together and we had our whole lives ahead of us. Sticking by each other provided irreplaceable support and made things less scary; more laughable.”

Together, they navigated through pronoun and name changes and even accompanied one another to their first support group meeting at Q Center.

“We talked for hours … I’m sure we could have talked all night,” Fisher says of the now-best friends’ first meet-up. “Under any other circumstances, I would never meet someone in real life that I met on the Internet, but when Wesley left a comment asking if I wanted to meet up I knew it was time I created real life community for myself.”

Kendon Fisher and Wes Chernin

While the meeting helped Fisher find his way to a larger community, it also sparked a lasting “bromance.” He jokes that it’s hard to talk about Chernin without making it sound like they are partners, but the love the two have for one another is apparent.

“Wesley has been my rock for the majority of my transition and has always been there for me,” Fisher says.

Chernin was even there the night Fisher first met his now-fiancée, Lissy Richards. The two mention the cute girl with the scarf working at Q Center’s front desk in a video filmed with a friend in the summer of 2011. All parties agree she’s attractive, but only Chernin is single at the time.

YouTube has played such an integral role in their transitions that the two young men struggle to imagine life without it. For both, the online community served as a primary source of information about big questions around identity as well as the day-to-day logistics of things like chest binding, hormone shots, and coming out to friends, family, and dates.

“YouTube was such a safe haven for me,” Chernin says. “It provided me with incredible knowledge on the transition process and some of the people I’ve met on YouTube are my best buds now. It’d be wild to have never jumped into that.”

Fisher agrees: “I couldn’t count the ways YouTube has changed my life. YouTube gave me community online and eventually in real life too,” he says. “If I had never found YouTube, I would still be that scared, confused, lonely 15-year-old with an ace bandage under my shirt.”

Both men hope to keep their YouTube channels up indefinitely, even as their interest in posting wanes — not because there is a shortage of transition stories on the site, but because each one is different, and that diversity is important.

“Prior to watching YouTube videos I was under the impression that in order to be trans I had to have known I was a boy since I was a toddler,” Chernin says. “Having access to YouTube videos enabled me to learn, straight from the source, the diversity in transgender stories. I then was able to figure out my own.”

As new generations of trans youth turn to the internet to find stories that resemble their own, Fisher and Chernin’s videos will join the vanguard of voices young people look up to.

“I don’t think of myself as a role model,” Fisher says, while acknowledging that he has shifted into the role of the people he once looked up to. “I just think of myself as a queer kid with a camera.”

Check out Fisher’s channel at youtube.com/jkendonn and Chernin’s channel at youtube.com/ourpalwes.

Transgender people in film have been much in focus this month, with festivals taking place in Bologna, Italy over the first weekend – and Amsterdam a week later.

The Italian Festival, Divergenti, billed itself as an international festival of transsexual film, and was organized by the Italian Transsexual Movement(Movimento Identitita Transessuale – or MIT, for short).

However, as most such events in Italy, this one ranged far wider than mere film, taking in a photography exhibition, a series of sessions looking at how trans identity is represented in the media, and an opportunity to examine the politics of such representation.

Let’s begin with the photos. The work, by Christian Cristalli, was an intelligent, provocative presentation of ambiguity. Bodies that might be this or that: genitalia obscured by artfully placed foliage; and the whole set off by commentary that added defiance to the overall air of ambivalence. We are trans, the work proudly proclaimed: get over it!

Inevitably though, a film festival is about film – and Divergenti did not disappoint. There was a certain amount of documentary, with first up Nessuno è Perfetto! (No-one is Perfect, 2013), directed by Fabiomassimo Lozzi, an intimate exploration of the dreams, experiences – and challenges – shared and faced by four individuals attempting to put together living a trans life.

The Ballad of Genesis P Breyer and Lady Jaye (2011), directed by Marie Losier documented ‘Creating the Pandrogyne’, a subversive project in which musician and artist, Genesis P Orridge, set out to create in himself the likeness of his beloved Lady Jaye. This film won the Teddy Award at the Berlinale in 2011

Then there was Sexing The Transman (2011), directed by and starring Buck Angel, famously billed as ‘the man with a vagina’. This provided an intriguing alternative exploration of female-to-male (FtM) sexuality, mediated through Buck’s own experience as a porn actor, and highlighting the fluidity, the subtle shadings that accompany FtM identity, as opposed to an absolute binary.

Wildness (2012) looked at the Latin American LGBT community in LA, while Turning (2012), directed by Charles Atlas presented us with that strangest of creatures, a musical documentary, exploring the themes of identity, transcendence and, as it claimed on the pack, ‘the revelation of being’.

All good in their way, though for me, there is a point at which one can have too much documentary. Perhaps that is to betray a certain ‘lightness’ on my part. Or simply, being so aware of the ‘standard trans narrative’, a sense that when the lights go down and the screen begins to flicker, I deserve to be entertained!

On the entertainment front honors must be evenly split between Noor (2012), directed by Çagla Zencirci and Guillaume Giovanetti – the story of a trans man finding his male identity and leaving the trans community behind, and Facing Mirrors (2011) directed by Negar Azarbayjani about an improbable friendship that breaks through social and religious barriers.

Sadly, I had not time to catch what I suspect might have been my favorite film of the weekend, La Patente (2011), directed by Alessandro Palazzi, which is a light-hearted comedy about a driving school in Rome, in which trans features as but one element among many, rather than being the focus of the story.

Because, in the end, I think I look forward to a day when a trans film festival is more about history than putting contemporary issues under the microscope.

Though, this being an Italian event, there was plenty of the latter.

A selection of short films showcased perhaps the most creative segment of the weekend, as well as highlighting how trans issues now touch every part of the globe.

Included were Love and other Red Spot Specials (Australia, 2008), Lili Longed to Feel Her Insides (USA, 2011), Burmese Butterfly (Burma, 2011), Ta Av Mig / Undress Me (Sweden, 2013), which also won the Teddy award at the Berlinale, 2013 for best short film, Il Mio Genere / My Gender (Italy, 2012) and La Victoria de Úrsula / Ursula’s Victory (Spain, 2011)

More directly involving were a series of talks, explorations and debates put on by the organizers of Divergenti. One event saw directors and film professionals to debate the role of trans in cinema, recognizing as they did a gradual evolution, from freak show and object of ridicule to a subject for more serious inquiry.

MIT President Porpora Marcasciano presented Dream and Utopia, illustrating much the same theme.

Trans people and the media were also in the spotlight, with two workshops focused on the issues and challenges for the trans community. In the first, Helen Belcher, for the UK’s Trans Media Watch, who is also a Gay Star News contributor, outlined the nature of transphobia and how the media perpetuated unhappy stereotypes. And I dissected the ways in which media transphobia did its work.

A parallel workshop, addressed by journalists and politicians from Italy, reviewed good and bad practices in an Italian context and included, for me the highlight of the weekend, Vladimir Luxuria, better known as ‘Vlady’ is an Italian actress, writer and television host. She was also the first and, at the time, only trans member of a European parliament, elected to the Italian Assembly as part of the Communist list.

None of which come even close to communicating what Vlady herself describes as her ‘fabulousness’. From witty putdowns of political opponents to dealing with hostile media types, Vlady made it more than clear why she was and still is a star, and the rest of us mere beginners.

It was a good film festival. However, as someone there first and foremost to talk about trans and the media, I’ll leave the last word to Vlady. All politicians, she explained, should have a sense of humor.

As for the press, she added: ‘A journalist who exploits your birth gender is taking sides… and usually they choose to side with the aggressor.’

Those who feel they missed out this time might like to know that Bologna is to play host to the 11th Gender Bender festival, organized by the LGBT Center in Bologna, in October-November later this year. Full details can be found on the Gender Bender website.

It was almost two years ago that my daughter, then three years old, met the wonderful person who is now her “other” mom. I’d brought her along for my first date with a cute, young man, explaining to him that I was a package deal and that he’d need to get to know my daughter if he wanted to know me. Before we parted ways, he whispered to me, “I want to kiss you good-bye, but I don’t want to confuse your daughter.” I pulled him aside and we shared our first, secret kiss. I quietly remarked, “You kiss like a woman,” and would have immediately regretted the comment it if it weren’t for the fact that he smiled, as if flattered, when I said it. A few weeks later, my budding love-interest filled me in on a big secret: “he” didn’t identify as a “he” at all, and, as a transgender woman, was beginning the process of transitioning to look more like the woman she saw herself as.

The first thing I thought was, “I have no idea how I’m going to explain this to my daughter.” After all, it had only been a few days since I’d explained to her the basic biological differences between boys and girls. How could I let my three year old know that Mommy’s boyfriend was actually Mommy’s girlfriend, and that she’d be changing her appearance to reflect that? It gave me enough pause that I considered ending our brand-new relationship right then and there. But love will make you do crazy things, and those crazy things often turn out wonderful… and I’m pleased to say that my soon-to-be-wife, who my daughter accepts as “kind of like a daddy and a mommy at the same time” is acknowledged and loved within my little family for the wonderful woman she is.

How did we get to this point? Talking to kids about transgenderism isn’t easy, but I feel like my family did it right. Here are five simple tips that, should you need to broach this topic with your own child, can help you navigate the potentially confusing topic of transgenderism.

1. Don’t make it a big deal.

If your child has a friend or relative who is transgender, your instinct might be to sit her down for one of those serious talks and have a deep, detailed discussion. This isn’t necessary and really might do more harm than good. Kids take things in stride when you introduce new or possibly confusing topics nonchalantly, instead of making a huge ordeal out of them. Keep the conversation casual and friendly, not formal and intimidating.

2. Explain that some people’s bodies and brains don’t match up.

You don’t have to go into the actual detailed definitions of gender and sex, but it’s important to clarify that how a person looks (or how a person was born) may not match how that person feels or presents. Before you bring up the person you’re talking about, you might tell your kiddo, “Remember how I told you that boys have penises and girls have vaginas? That’s true almost all of the time, but there are some people who feel like girls when they were born with boy-bodies, or feel like girls when they were born with boy-bodies.” Listen to any feedback your child has and answer any questions that may arise, factually and respectfully.

3. Teach respect for gender identity.

This is easier than most parents expect. After all, if your kid has known Uncle Jake for 10 years, what is he going to do when he’s suddenly asked to call his “uncle” Aunt Jackie? It’s really not as hard as you or your child might think. Just explain, “Even though Aunt Jackie is still the exact same person, she feels sad about the fact that she looks like a man right now, and she feels sad when people call her Jake. I need you to be respectful of Aunt Jackie by calling her by the name she wants and talking about her as if she is a girl, because she doesn’t feel like a man and it’s not fair to call her one.” Of course, model this by consistently using correct names and pronouns around your child. Remind your kiddo that it’s okay to slip up every now and then (accidental use of “old” name or pronoun is, unfortunately, something that trans people encounter often), but make sure your child is making an effort to be respectful. Your kid will adjust more easily than you might think.

4. Explain transitioning in kid-friendly terms.

No, your child doesn’t need to know about everything that transitioning (or a “sex-change”) entails, but, if your child knows someone who is transgender, she deserves to have some idea of what’s going to happen to her loved one. One simple way to explain it might be, “Since Aunt Jackie looks like a man right now and that makes her sad, she has to take medicine that will make her look more like a lady. She might not look like a man at all anymore pretty soon, but she’ll still be the same person inside.” Your kids (especially tweens and teens) might have questions about surgical treatments, but it’s best to avoid discussing these with kids. The details of surgery, and whether or not a trans person will have it, is unnecessary and violates that person’s privacy unless that person is freely sharing the information. You might simply say that you don’t know if Aunt Jackie is having surgery because her private parts aren’t anyone else’s business, but you can add that it would be nice to send her cards or flowers if she has to be in the hospital at some point.

5. Offer reassurance and real answers.

Learning about transgenderism can be confusing and intimidating even for adults, but kids may be especially befuddled by the concept. Kids have naturally open minds and most have no problem accepting it, but others might have a lot of questions (How does a person know if she’s transgender? If there are transgender women, are there also transgender men? How do those medicines work?) or be confused and worried (Are these treatments dangerous? Does this mean I might grow up to be the opposite sex, even though I don’t want to? Are people going to make fun of me for having a transgender friend or relative?) To all of these concerns, it’s best to have simple, easy, and reassuring answers ready. Nothing about this conversation, or the experience of knowing a transgender person, has to be stressful. Keep an open mind and a compassionate voice and you’ll find that this seemingly difficult conversation is far easier than you might expect.

thecsph:

It’s National Masturbation Month! To celebrate, we’ll be highlighting past Q&As on the topic every Wednesday in May. Today’s featured question is:

Is there a masturbation sleeve similar to the fleshlight for transmen?

Read our answer here!

[Click here to ask us a question and see our archive]